clovenhooves The Personal Is Political Everyday Sexism ''positive male role models'' is such an easy cop-out to excuse misogyny in boys

''positive male role models'' is such an easy cop-out to excuse misogyny in boys

''positive male role models'' is such an easy cop-out to excuse misogyny in boys

 
Mar 19 2026, 8:57 AM
#1
I often see people say that boys need positive male role models especially in the context of misogyny among gen Z males. They'll say it in the context of discussion about the manosphere, suggesting that Tate and the like are attractive to follow due to ''lack of positive male role models''. It also appears when discussing education and school and how we need more male teachers in every level, or when cowardly/indirectly shaming single moms for being single. (as if the dad who left, would be a ''positive male role model'' in the first place but they don't think that one through)

But... Aren't there plenty? Yeah, okay, I'll admit that the names of many celebrities and famous men are tainted by scandals, but that doesn't make them worse than Tate. Okay, but then there're also still plenty of examples that ARE decent, right? At least as far as we know now. And moving away from famous men, there're also, one hopes, plenty of ''positive male role models'' on a smaller scale in these boy's lives. Or else people who use that argument are more misandrist than I am. Coaches, teachers, neighbours, friends' fathers... There should still be plenty.

So why, then, do they choose to listen to rabid misogynists? Well, that's where we're starting to ask the real questions. I just find it annoying how easily people accept the rationalization of ''we need more positive male role models'' as if that means anything, but when you pick it apart, it doesn't.

And let's say there's a genuinely positive famous man who treats women right. Alright: he per definition isn't what they look up to anymore. A decent male teacher telling them not to be raging misogynists is just [whatever incel MRA insult is treding right now].
Edited Mar 19 2026, 8:58 AM by Mixmax.
2
1
1
Mixmax
Mar 19 2026, 8:57 AM #1

I often see people say that boys need positive male role models especially in the context of misogyny among gen Z males. They'll say it in the context of discussion about the manosphere, suggesting that Tate and the like are attractive to follow due to ''lack of positive male role models''. It also appears when discussing education and school and how we need more male teachers in every level, or when cowardly/indirectly shaming single moms for being single. (as if the dad who left, would be a ''positive male role model'' in the first place but they don't think that one through)

But... Aren't there plenty? Yeah, okay, I'll admit that the names of many celebrities and famous men are tainted by scandals, but that doesn't make them worse than Tate. Okay, but then there're also still plenty of examples that ARE decent, right? At least as far as we know now. And moving away from famous men, there're also, one hopes, plenty of ''positive male role models'' on a smaller scale in these boy's lives. Or else people who use that argument are more misandrist than I am. Coaches, teachers, neighbours, friends' fathers... There should still be plenty.

So why, then, do they choose to listen to rabid misogynists? Well, that's where we're starting to ask the real questions. I just find it annoying how easily people accept the rationalization of ''we need more positive male role models'' as if that means anything, but when you pick it apart, it doesn't.

And let's say there's a genuinely positive famous man who treats women right. Alright: he per definition isn't what they look up to anymore. A decent male teacher telling them not to be raging misogynists is just [whatever incel MRA insult is treding right now].

2
1
1
Mar 19 2026, 7:51 PM
#2
That's a good point. Why are boys drawn to the really shitty examples of men? After a certain age, seems like they should be able to recognize bad behavior.
Elsacat
Mar 19 2026, 7:51 PM #2

That's a good point. Why are boys drawn to the really shitty examples of men? After a certain age, seems like they should be able to recognize bad behavior.

Clover
Kozlik's regular account 🍀🐐
1,560
Mar 20 2026, 6:31 PM
#3
I think they're drawn to the shitty examples because then they can justify being shitty men. It's easier to be a shit person than a decent person.

And it relies on the assumption they want to be decent people to begin with. They see misogynist men promoting patriarchy, realize that patriarchy means they can oppress half the human race just because of their almighty peen, and they're like "awesome!" It's the same as white people gravitating towards white racist leaders -- they are looking for an opportunity to oppress others, because they feel that is worth more to them than being a decent person.

So yeah, the "we need more positive male role models" lamentation does indeed feel like a cop-out. We need to create a society where most men aren't encouraged and actually rewarded by being misogynistic depraved people.
Clover
Kozlik's regular account 🍀🐐
Mar 20 2026, 6:31 PM #3

I think they're drawn to the shitty examples because then they can justify being shitty men. It's easier to be a shit person than a decent person.

And it relies on the assumption they want to be decent people to begin with. They see misogynist men promoting patriarchy, realize that patriarchy means they can oppress half the human race just because of their almighty peen, and they're like "awesome!" It's the same as white people gravitating towards white racist leaders -- they are looking for an opportunity to oppress others, because they feel that is worth more to them than being a decent person.

So yeah, the "we need more positive male role models" lamentation does indeed feel like a cop-out. We need to create a society where most men aren't encouraged and actually rewarded by being misogynistic depraved people.

Impress Polly
The kind they warned you about.
215
Mar 25 2026, 3:48 AM
#4
The whole claim about a lack of male role models I find pathetic. Sorry your dad abandoned his family because his wife out-earned him, but that would be his fault, not mine. Wanna know what MY dad was like?? I wish he had left. How about my bitter stepmom? My golden girl sister? Anyone give a rat's ass about my family life? No? Okay. That is because I still function because I have to. I don't get to wallow around in self-pity as a worthless NEET and blame everyone else for my own faults.

Looking for other male sources of inspiration? The overwhelming majority of public figures in general are men, whether it's politicians, capitalists, actors, musicians, prominent scientists, philosophers, researchers, athletes, or whatever the case may be (even at the "feminine" art of meal preparation, male chefs far outnumber their female counterparts, seriously)...and out of all those options, Clavicular is your choice? The one you find most inspiring? And you ask for my sympathy? ...PFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!! :psycholaugh: Go try the libfems on Two X Chromosomes cuz you will get no pity from me, who spent my childhood obsessing with Jane Gooddall not because she was that special in my mind really so much as because she was THE female scientist I knew about. Me who failed to follow my dreams because I lost myself and got tired of feeling like a freak all the time. And just look at me now, bagging your groceries. Happy....or something.
Edited Mar 25 2026, 6:01 PM by Impress Polly.
Impress Polly
The kind they warned you about.
Mar 25 2026, 3:48 AM #4

The whole claim about a lack of male role models I find pathetic. Sorry your dad abandoned his family because his wife out-earned him, but that would be his fault, not mine. Wanna know what MY dad was like?? I wish he had left. How about my bitter stepmom? My golden girl sister? Anyone give a rat's ass about my family life? No? Okay. That is because I still function because I have to. I don't get to wallow around in self-pity as a worthless NEET and blame everyone else for my own faults.

Looking for other male sources of inspiration? The overwhelming majority of public figures in general are men, whether it's politicians, capitalists, actors, musicians, prominent scientists, philosophers, researchers, athletes, or whatever the case may be (even at the "feminine" art of meal preparation, male chefs far outnumber their female counterparts, seriously)...and out of all those options, Clavicular is your choice? The one you find most inspiring? And you ask for my sympathy? ...PFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!! :psycholaugh: Go try the libfems on Two X Chromosomes cuz you will get no pity from me, who spent my childhood obsessing with Jane Gooddall not because she was that special in my mind really so much as because she was THE female scientist I knew about. Me who failed to follow my dreams because I lost myself and got tired of feeling like a freak all the time. And just look at me now, bagging your groceries. Happy....or something.

Recently Browsing
 2 Guest(s)
Recently Browsing
 2 Guest(s)