Quote:A new report shows that more women than ever are walking away from their marriages because they have ‘just had enough’. But, while husbands are left in shock after an ‘out-of-the-blue’ divorce, Flic Everett discovers, it is a very different story for their wives

Quote:Rather than put up and shut up, women in midlife are realising that there’s more to life than a grumpy or self-interested husband, and voting with their feet. While men used to initiate more divorces – the classic midlife crisis where they ran off with a younger woman – this has shifted over the past few years. Today, women are as likely to start divorce proceedings, especially in midlife. And more than ever, this is coming out of the blue for their comfortable husbands who had assumed everything was just ticking along nicely.

Quote:The “walkaway wife” phenomenon has been confirmed by a new report. Findings from the law firm Mishcon de Reya, wealth management company Julius Baer, and the midlife community platform NOON show that women are often calling the shots based on nothing more than simply having ‘had enough’.

Nearly 50 per cent of divorces are now being instigated by women, with 56 per cent of them saying they would end a marriage simply because they felt unhappy. Whereas another man or woman entering the scene used to be a triggering factor for divorce, 64 per cent of female respondents said they ended their marriages for reasons other than infidelity. A significant 23 per cent of women reported that falling out of love was at the root of their desire to split, and 11 per cent simply didn’t want to spend the rest of their life with someone with whom they’d grown apart.

Quote: husbands are left in shock after an ‘out-of-the-blue’ divorce

Quote: And more than ever, this is coming out of the blue for their comfortable husbands who had assumed everything was just ticking along nicely.

Quote:with 56 per cent of them saying they would end a marriage simply because they felt unhappy. 

(Nov 24 2025, 9:22 AM)Magpie

Quote:husbands are left in shock after an ‘out-of-the-blue’ divorce

Quote:And more than ever, this is coming out of the blue for their comfortable husbands who had assumed everything was just ticking along nicely.

Something tells me it would feel less as if the divorce came out of nowhere if any of these men could be bothered to pay attention to how their wife is feeling. You have known this woman for years on end, presumably lived together and still couldn't pick up a single clue that she was deeply unhappy? No wonder she is leaving you.

Nwwoodsymom We saw a therapist towards the end when things were really bad and she asked us to rate our marriage. I was sobbing on the couch, and I said 2. He said nine. NINE. It was then I realized that nothing was ever going to change because as bad as things were he was getting his needs met and didn’t see a reason to change.

It will be 4 years this Jan that we separated and I’m so thankful. Financially it was devastating, I was a SAHM to 3 kids. But we are thriving.

[...]

I heard from several people that he says “I just suddenly left”, and has no idea why. Our divorce took two years and the last day before papers were signed he gave some half effort email saying “Fine, I will take pills or whatever you want.” He wasn’t able to get it up our entire marriage and his response was always that he just needed to lose some weight. 8 years of no sex and that’s not even why we divorced. It was the lies and living like roommates.

(Nov 24 2025, 10:32 AM)YesYourNigel Reminds me of all the dead bedroom men who just DoN't UnDeRsTaNd why their wife won't have sex with them and can you just give them tips on how to emotionally manipulate her into sex more?

Women are just hard to understand, we just have no clue why they don't want to keep serving entitled men and have shitty sex with them, it just makes no sense! Women are a mystery when you don't recognise that they could possibly look out for their own interests.

zf2y69i I checked out the r/MenopauseShedforMen site.

Reading how these men are pissed that their sex appliance, I mean menopausal wife, is on the fritz, tells me that not enough women are divorcing midlife.

Go find your joy and freedom. ladies. I did it. Never looked back and have never been happier.

SeasonPositive6771 That subreddit is honestly horrifying. It's the same thing when their posts make it on r/perimenopause - they don't care their wives are in horrible pain or being psychologically tortured, the thing they care most about is getting their dicks wet, and a distant second is that their wives don't look young anymore. It's disgusting.

emccm They come on to /r/menopause frequently. You can tell their wives have been suffering but they only care when the sex stops and the sex stops for a lot more reasons than menopause. You can usually tell why from their comments and of course the fact they came to a women’s space to dump their problems on us and demand a solution.

Quote:We saw a therapist towards the end when things were really bad and she asked us to rate our marriage. I was sobbing on the couch, and I said 2. He said nine. NINE.

It was then I realized that nothing was ever going to change because as bad as things were he was getting his needs met and didn’t see a reason to change.

Quote:YesYourNigel wrote:
"Women are just hard to understand"...

(Nov 26 2025, 4:36 AM)Impress Polly The classic male "midlife crisis" is just the discovery that they're not the main character in life, bound for special importance like they've been told for their whole entitled lives. Life just owed them more than a stable job, a stable marriage, and kids by now, so it's time to blow all that up because it's supposedly holding them back; randomly quit their job, run off with a younger woman to recapture their youth, etc. The pure selfishness knows no limits! Women, by contrast, are trained to think of ourselves as supporting characters, so we don't tend to have those expectations. For a woman, the emerging version of this crisis looks like it stems from an entirely different level of suffering, not simply the discovery that you aren't special. Men blow up their marriages out of entitlement. Women are ending theirs just to retain ANY sense of worth. 

Quote:YesYourNigel wrote:
"Women are just hard to understand"...

That's my favorite male response to female frustrations. I've been hearing that classic line echo throughout the culture for my whole life! No, women aren't extra tough to understand, you just don't try! You don't listen; you only think about yourself!

(Nov 29 2025, 9:27 PM)ShameMustChangeSides I saw something the other day that was like, women are hard to understand? Okay, how many books written by women have you read? How many women do you ask questions? How many female artists and musicians do you pay attention to? How many female friends do you have?

Of course, the answer to all this for most men is a resounding ZERO. I remember my own father saying he avoids books by women because he just doesn't understand how women's minds work and I was like... You don't think those two things are related, but you've switched cause and effect, perhaps?